I can’t let another week go by without writing here!
There has been so much swirling about in our lives and I’ve found it hard to sit down to write. I want to share everything in detail but realize that’s probably not the best idea because I also realize this blog is open to everyone. Trying to discern how much to tell is never simple!
As we have journeyed through infertility these last two years I haven’t enjoyed talking about it. It’s confusing for me and trying to process it on this blog didn’t seem right.
There hasn’t been any clear answers and often times I can’t find the words to pray. It’s easy to give God shouts of praise when He is blessing us, but experiencing a trial can make giving praise tricky. My prayer is always that He would give me a better perspective. I believe He is good no matter what I’m facing but I still have questioned.
Why would a loving Father withhold a good thing like a baby? His plans are greater.
Every time I catch myself wondering this, His reply is always Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
This last month I watched a dear friend welcome a new baby into her family who came through an adoption. Seeing how God brought their family together is a huge testament of His love. Seeing our friends become mom and dad to now two little boys is incredible.
Darren and I have prayed and talked about adoption and as of now we’re unsure this is the path for our family. We are always open to what God has in mind but that hasn’t been made clear to us yet. It brings me hope that the Lord is aware of the plans He has for us.
I’m filled with hope because I know that even if I never have another baby, I have learned how precious my firstborn son is.
That his life was timed by God, and his days are set for a purpose. I have hope because Jesus was and is enough to fill my heart from corner to corner. His love will sustain me.
I do appreciate the prayers of those closest to me who have listened to my ‘wonderings’ and given me an encouraging word. You have no idea how great that has been to have people holding me up during some of those sad days. Thank you!
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Our church met last night and proposed a new direction.
It was recommended that we merge with another church. I have come to love our church family and realize how bittersweet this is for many. We are no strangers to change as a military family.
The thing that brings us pleasure at church has been that comfort of knowing what to expect each week and now it’s unknown. I’d imagine for the people who have attended longer than I, this change is even more significant in their lives. But so far I’ve seen amazing character from our leaders, elders, and those who have spoken to me about it.
These are tough times for our church in America and there is an active force to see the work of God put to an end.
It seems God is weaving His family closer together though. We were always meant to be one body with one mission in mind. To reach the lost and tell of Jesus’ love, poured out for all.
I want to be a part of that and even if that means changing a few things, it’s worth it.
I’m praying for my church family, that God would gives us wisdom and both an open mind and heart to His plan.
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In these days I realize the struggle between my love for pleasure and love for God is becoming a real battle.
I love to be comfortable.
At the same time I realize that a life devoted to serving God isn’t always full of pleasure. Sacrifice is not an easy request and it’s what God requires of those who follow Him.
Each week God presses this message against me and i’m learning how to apply what has to be different.
Well I hope your weekend was great! Thanks for listening to me. I hope you would find some encouragement today through what God is working about in our family.
To reach out to you a little, I wonder how your churches are doing. If you’ve ever faced similar circumstances and how you walked through that time with wisdom. I’d love to hear from you on this or just how you’re doing would be great too!
Until next time,